Be Strong, Believe

being sick sucks. i've been coughing up weird-tasting phlegm all morning, and i can still sense it on my breath. it also comes with breathing difficulties and an incipent fever that i stopped from breaking with acetaminophen and a dose of DotA.

wish i could find company to see Madagascar. looks like a lot of fun! in fact, today would have been the perfect day to go if not for the rain. oh well... tts life

Believe - Yellowcard

Will That Be All?

really wiped... perio test coming up tomoro. have rammed in as much as i can. now all thats left is to watch shaman king and get some shuteye...

hope i can get setup of teeth approved by tomoro. aiming to get the waxup done as well. and next week i can invest and pack and let my damn dentures cure and it will be happiness for all! need to clear this so that i can start seeing my full patients... the management is killing me!

Coming Closer - L'Arc En Ciel

Blue Sky Surprise

once again, doing late blogging. saturday was a real tiring day, midnight DotA the night before combined with a whole day at Toa Payoh. but i think it was a day pretty well spent. besides all the OHI given, you really get to see the way people work... got persuaded by Shunting to check my blood sugar. ok... fair deal. basically it involves taking an auto-lancet and piercing a finger to draw blood, then using an automated machine to analyse said blood's glucose concentration. 5.9 apparently, inside the physiological range. and then she proceeded to wipe my finger with an alcohol swab. like... bloody hell! it actually hurts. and when i asked why she does this routinely, she said its because her seniors do it. not really the way i wanna practice... and haemostasis should not be achieved using tissue paper! it sticks to the clot, and when you try to remove it the clot will tear.

watched Star Wars III during the 2nd shift at Toa Payoh. seats arent too bad, the usual Eng Wah standard. the movie itself... 3.5 on 5 i suppose. sure, its got swooshy lightsaber duels and all, but the plot development was a letdown. like how Anakin is just so easy for Palpatine to manpulate. what a weak character! way too sudden... Natalie Portman was also rather under-deployed, basically just there to smooch and die. in the hands of another director, with a script more developed, this might have risen higher. as it is, there was potentially enough material in there for another hour of film time.

just got back from the HC String Ensemble concert. really does remind me of the days when i used to play in concerts. cant say i dont miss it... the music was competent but not outstanding due to a lack of dynamics. Alicia and Debra the Violin Girls got solos, and they were good! shoulda gotten more airtime, the other quartet and quintet performances were rather sub-par. but hey.. for $7 whos complaining?

Tempo Impetuoso D'Estate - HCSE feat. Alicia Boo

I Dont Wanna Go Back Home, But I Dont Wanna Be Alone

i think school is just making me feel lower and lower. besides not having a person to bitch to (yeah a blog is not a person) 2 members of my DotA brotherhood are out of play. GF's com is messed up, and Stan's TFT CD is not with him.

i swear, for the life of me, bilateral balance has me baffled. i seem to be incapable of making the damn teeth in the denture line up for me and touch where i want them to. its been way too long to balance the blasted, infernal contraption. crowns rock, man. they just touch and they work. invest and cast and youre on your way to happiness. but noooo.... stupid dentures.

Ber contacted me about doing following spotlight for SMU's production of Anything Goes. looked like some kinda vaguely fun thing to do in the holidays, so i'll be checking the dates tomorrow with Dean's Office to see if im free. hope it turns out good!

I - Pug Jelly

The Only Person Singing Me To Sleep Is Myself

the DotA brotherhood were having a little OT talk in BNet one night and the content of my blogs came up somehow. yeah... so mebbe i am a bit of a drama mamma. but i believe in writer's integrity, and i wont edit my blog contents after they have been posted unless there are spelling errors. and the feelings and thoughts that pertain to me are always from the bottom of my heart.

finally, a positive food review! Sin Hoi Sai Eating House in Tiong Bahru is the kind of place where restaurant chefs go to eat. i have yet to taste a bad dish from their establishment. besides their famed chilli crab, other dishes such as watercress soup, prawn-paste chicken and chilli kang kong are robust, flavourful and definite must-haves. please visit this place.

was surprised by a song playing on 93.3 on the way back home, cos its not often they play english songs, and this one was a classic. the chordwork just impressed itself on me as the song of the day...

It Must Have Been Love - Roxanne

Burnout

just went for dinner... it was a sad affair. the XO Fish Beehoon at HV tastes like crap! after a 6-month-long period of not going there, i was shocked. the beehoon had no bounce, instead breaking apart easily. there was way too much XO in the soup, masking the flavour of the milk. the only thing left was the fish, which was thankfully still okay. at five Yusof Ishaks a bowl... not really my idea of culinary value for money. gross.

why cant there be 30 hours in a day? theres so much to do, and not enough time to do it. and i really want to watch Star Wars III...

California - Love Psychedelico

Tugback

i guess it was the lonely dinner of Hongkong Mee in Enclave that kinda settled it for me. feeling too down to go for SF, feeling too down to do just about anything now. i havent had too many desperately low days in this term, but i guess this is one of them.

i really believe that i'm happiest by her side, and i cant apologise enough for all the screwups and mishaps that i visit on her through my clumsiness, ineptitude and bad temper. to see her smile is like seeing a rainbow, her laughter is like a sunbeam shining through the departing clouds of a rainstorm. so much stands between us, and yet it is all but idealogical. i may stand beside her and yet feel the great gulf that separates our hearts. am i destined to admire from the shadows for the rest of my life? relief has yet to come to me, the flame that lights my heart burns so strong that none other has yet to take its place to light up my black little heart. as much as it pains me to consider this, there is the part of me that doesnt want the flame to be extinguished, ever. and, perhaps, all i will have is the smiles and laughter of a blissfully ignorant friend whom my heart beats for.

Me And My Imaginary Friend

guess today was eventful enough to blog about! saw a yellow file patient, and got to play pool for the first time in like forever.

Dr Thean had some yellow file patients arranged for RP today. these are the comunity patients who dont have the cash to pay for NUS Student treatment even, a lot of the work they do is free of charge, except for, as i recall, fixed prosthetics. and these guys all needed stuff done. they came in in various states of treatment, from try-in of wax dentures to my one who had some e-stuff done, an exo to be exact, but requires a whole new upper full and a lot of perio work on the lower. and the perio... this is the first time i've ever seen a Grade 3 mobility. and i had to scale it... despite Dr Thean's offhand assurances i was a bit worried the damn thing would drop out while i was ripping Great-Wall calculus off of it with an anterior sickle, it was that shaky. and yeah, the calculus and plaque was just amazing. i found a massively deep carious cavity while prodding in the plaque while doing E&D, all hidden in the plaque. i dont know if we'll end up treating this one or just extracting. funny enough, its a lot firmer than a lot of the other teeth, which are intact but shaky.

went out with Char after school. dinner at Thai Express was ok... food was fine but the service... i think the staff dont like me, they seem to have a thing for ignoring my hand. and i got stalked by Mao and Shafiq and Stan. went for pool after, and damn well nearly won her. i need more practce dammit, my play is way too inconsistent. not like i'll be able to get any games in during the month she's in the US though. dammit...

Hopelessly Devoted To You - Olivia Newton-John

I'm Cleaning Out My Closet...

Happy Mother's Day!

and on that note, i'd like to write a bit about mothers. today Uncle Robert gave a testimony about his late mum. it was a different generation, the war generation to be exact but mothers are really the under-appreciated people in our society. they raise the children, and in the chinese family paradigm yer more likely to find people with impressions of their mums than their dads. not that this is the best or the healthiest situation but such is their power. even now i think a lot of the families are being held together by mothers who basically do everything possible...

was up on stage playing the prelude when Josh nudged me...

Josh: omg its teh GURMITZ!

me: simi? gurmit singh?! where?! where?!

and the dear chap had his back turned to me for like 2 min as i tried simultaneously playing flute without looking at my score while trying to spot him. it turns out that Gurmit Singh is somehow related to the aforementioned Uncle Robert, and was visiting for the week. he got mobbed by little kids at lunchtime asking for autographs lol.

Jo is in the states now, havent heard from her. according to her blog she had delays and missed connecting flights and all sorts of happening things. sheesh, all the fun while im here stuck w clinics...

Time Of Your Life - Green Day

*good luck for crown prep guys.. but then again luck has nothing to do with it*

To Another Sliding Step

think that even though things have been pretty rough, enough interesting things have happened that i should get down to the sadly neglected blogging.

i finally got to find out my crown competency results. in spite of the awful work, i passed. quite amazed because of the number of critical flaws contained therein. the endo test died though, and that means that my endo knowledge isnt up to scratch by a very large margin. so much to work on, so little time. at least something went right though.

the stress is still pretty bad. Lulin said that i lost weight, and i dont know if its the schoolwork or the food poisoning episode i had. or whether emotional matters have been weighing on my subconscious. i know that a lot of the class is still very withdrawn and many are in various states of sickness. so many are eating meagre packed lunches in the faculty... its freakish. and we havent even actually entered year 3.

For The Future - Do As Infinity

Tears Of The Road Ahead

i am now officially 2 years away to being a quarter of a century old. as far as birthdays went, it wasnt too eventful. but nice enough in its own way. got out of bed late, had a lunch binge at a hotel buffet, and got to watch a movie at night with Jo.

The Interpreter seemed like the only movie in the whole of GV Marina worth watching. i had my doubts, not remembering how the reviews in the papers turned out. it was well worth the risk. Sean Penn is a true workhorse actor with credible emotions, who put in a good turn as a Secret Service agent with a very vunerable, human side. Kidman excelled in a role which didnt require glam-ness per se, and even had a cute little south african accent to boot. excellent plot twists, excellent casting, just excellent. please watch this one.

Who Will You Think Of - Zhang Dongliang

Only You

usually dont blog so many times in a week, but i just felt the urge to reflect on all the stuff that's gone on since we started term. i think the class is going downhill. i suppose its a common theme in all my rants, cos we dont go out and blah blah yakkety-shmakkety. and frankly i do miss watching movies and drinking coffee and karaoke and windsurfing and all that jazz. but the decline has gotten to a level where now everyone i talk to feels a sense of detachment from the class, as if they have been left to fend for themselves. please people, remember that your support network extends to all 34 of us. most of us have made the effort to at least bond with our cluster during year 1 and 2... dont let a friendship slide just because we are in clinics now. we cannot chain our souls to the lab bench. please leave when you should, and not when its past our time. pissing off the profs and supporting staff one by one has no good outcome. i know that there's the perfectionist urge in all of us, and if we didnt have that we'd make pretty poor dental students. but yet theres the ability to sense when something is appropriate, when it is time to cover the wax, wipe off the omega trimmer and walk out the door for the night.

i'd also like to say that these 2 weeks wouldnt have been so bearable without the presence of my Lab Partner PJ. working with her next to me in OD is like having an extra pair of hands and an extra brain. certainly much more comfortable because i dont feel so alone. and her buoyant sense of humour is a definite added bonus. i think i'd really be lost without her, she means a lot to me.

My Will - Dream

Pick It Up And Carry On

after the last week of gaming, i have come to the conclusion that any players from CA, US and TH have connections of questionable reliability. and NUS connection is abysmal. ping times are excellent diagnostic tools where available but not easy to obtain due to firewalling. and if i see any more CA players who insist on their connections being good, i will just request that they be booted. im tired of having precious gaming time wasted.

gonna do my first hand scaling tomorrow. should be quite interesting, cos ive actually never scaled a live patient before. i mean... Oscar sure doesnt cut it as a simulator. he doesnt drool or bleed or complain. hope i learn a lot.

think im getting used to clinics work. the bothersome thing that is exact. and i hope that things will lighten up for the class. everyone seems so disturbed and stressed by clinics. frankly, its gonna be a way of life. have to adapt, or die.

My Wish - My Life - Do As Infinity

I Cannot Recreate What Life Was Like Through Photographs

love lazy saturdays! spent a good part of it asleep, to make up for all the stress that i've taken in through the week. got a new Robotech comic too, shows the wedding of Max and Miriya. now the only major event left for the week is the health screening at Lot 1 tomorrow.

Prof Hsu said that when man is out of contact with nature, he gets more frazzy. suppose its true. when you cannot see the stars or feel the wind blow in your hair, life seems so much more desperate. i know that i feel really good going to school in the morning because i can cross the overhead bridge and see the bouganvilleas in bloom and feel the wind toss my hair. and it all disappears by 11am, when i start to get hungry and floppy...

had a reminder about how to keep in mind people's styles of work in 2 different incidents that happened through the week. its just something so important, but we still forget that our lab partners dont know everything about how we like to have things done, or our character flaws. its something we'll have to work with slowly as we go on into year 3 and 4.

Ci Niao - F.I.R.

Blott En Dag

its been so long since i blogged, and so much has happened in the week. it seems as if im too busy to even read patient files, which isnt exactly good... and everyone is amazingly tired.

heres a song that came up during SF...

Day by day, and with each passing moment,

Strength I find, to meet my trials here;

Trusting in my Father’s wise bestowment,

I’ve no cause for worry or for fear.

He whose heart is kind beyond all measure

Gives unto each day what He deems best—

Lovingly, its part of pain and pleasure,

Mingling toil with peace and rest.

.
Every day, the Lord Himself is near me

With a special mercy for each hour;

All my cares He fain would bear, and cheer me,

He Whose Name is Counselor and Pow’r.

The protection of His child and treasure

Is a charge that on Himself He laid;

“As thy days, thy strength shall be in measure,”

This the pledge to me He made.

.
Help me then in every tribulation

So to trust Thy promises, O Lord,

That I lose not faith’s sweet consolation

Offered me within Thy holy Word.

Help me, Lord, when toil and trouble meeting,

E’er to take, as from a father’s hand,

One by one, the days, the moments fleeting,

Till I reach the promised land.

is it not God and God alone who keeps me on my feet all day, and gives me the energy to do what i do? i couldnt do it alone, it would certainly be so much more miserable...

DotA v6.06 is out! gonna test-run it before i go crash. Sand King got balanced... see what else has changed...

Days Of Days Over You - Love Psychedelico

The Legend Of The Thornbird

i just got the new F.I.R. CD! its pretty good, good tunes and some thematic linkage to their last album. more thumpy music for my DotA playlist...

watched The Pacifier yesterday with Jo. it wasnt too bad really. coherent plotline, good comic work and Vin Diesel can actually look paternal. quite amazed by that. also a very Jacky Chan-esque fight scene in a nursery room. it was great to watch and de-stress to yesterday...

got a new patient today. a Filipina from church is having pain, Prof Foong said it looks like a pulpitis. i hope i can slot her into the Wednesday Perio session to begin E&D, and if there really is a pulpitis that requires intervention the OD doctor will have to step in... either way its a learning experience.

LOVE*3 - F.I.R.

No Way Through

one week of clinics gone by. got to say its been the most tiring school week ever! im actually quite amazed im still alive, all the clinics is just so sapping. and people can still stay late after school and do work. its just crazy.

got to go out for a while today. it woulda been longer if we coulda dislodged some people out of the lab faster... but it was good to walk the streets and see the sights, eat food not cooked on Kent Ridge and just have fun. on the one hand clinics are interesting, but on the other hand we still need to de-stress. at least my cluster isnt too would up... most of my new cluster people are okay workers.

Lofty Spires Of Ice That Pierce The Intense Azure Vault

day one of school has gone by. one patient seen, and i want to die! guess its pretty common all ard the class, for those who had to see patients. esp for A and B cluster, since we were solo-ing the session. at least i got my stuff banged into exact. i still have to rearrange appointments with a patient due to not knowing that RP sessions are meant to be spent working on more pre-clinical stuff. and theres all the E&D stuff to clear up! still have to find out wtf my patient is on. high platelet count? platelet depressor? what in the world? splenectomy? man... the things you never knew you never knew.

i miss my holidays already. studyin for the RP test tomorrow just highlighted that my brain probably atrophied with joy while i was on holiday. or shrank in the cold of Yulong Xueshan. that place was fun! even though the area at the top of the mountain was so small and restricted, snow is always great to mess around with (but not to live in, i'll qualify) and the view on the way up rocked. i think i'd actually willingly consider Yunnan as a honeymoon destination. places like Heilong Tang and Yulong Xueshan are really scenic. makes Singapore look so small and boring... not that this is a revolutionary statement.

i really should find time to finish off the paladin. the armour has been brown-washed and drybrushed and highlighted. work on the tunic has started. and thats it.

Nagai Aida - Kiroro

Take My Picture Off the Wall If It Just Won't Sing For You

here i am freezing my toes off in a Lijiang hotel room. amazing place, a low-rise hotel concept with amazing facilities, like a computer in my room! the china trip really looks like its a lot more fun than i thought it would be...

to summarise all of the places i've been so far would be to exhaust my infamously bad memory. i've skated in the middle of Kunming City, eaten dog ribs and roasted chicken heart seated on woven straw stools. i've strolled the streats of Lijiang Old Town and been in too many photos courtesy of my Dad. i've seen toilets ranging from long-drop-into-cesspit to amazingly nice public toilets in a historical district. i've strolled the park in HeiLongTang and the streets of Kunming after midnight. and yet...

every time i hear Sun Yanzi on the radio i think of home. every time i see the planet hanging out near the Big Dipper at night i think of the ones i left behind. guess im still a Singaporean at heart. because whats important to me is still there. my heart, my home, my life, my DotA clan. this place is great but at the end of it all i'll be glad to be back. even without the huo guo.

Ni Hao Zhou Jielun - An Youqi

Are We There Yet?

in Terminal One siphoning the free starhub net access from terminal thingy. its laggggeeeee! but its free, so not too much to complain about.

to my total amazement i actually managed to get 2 or 3 patients for Week 1! yeah, now i'll have stuff to do for perio and OD sessions. really got to thank God for all the calling that got done at the last minute. and even the perio patient who transmogrified into a partial denture case. when we bring her in we'll see how her perio status is lah... hope she can go straight on to the RD but if not we'll have to stabilise her gums lah.

without DotA for a week... scary thought. and no Anime on Central. tried smsing Charles to ask him to tape it for me but not reply. damn!